Making the choice to go on medication for any sort of problem can be huge. Two years ago my therapist suggested I go on antidepressants to help with my overwhelming suicidal thoughts.
At first I did not want to. I thought I would make it through this season and all I needed
was talk therapy to get by. But days turned into weeks and I still was seriously struggling with my depression and anxiety. So I took the plunge to try using medicine to make me feel better.
Guys I’ll be honest, finding the right medicine for me took six long months. I would try a new pill almost once a month and increase my dose until I could not go any higher.
Every time nothing worked. I wouldn’t feel any better and often times I felt nauseous. It was awful.
One of the worst experiences for me was having withdrawal. I had been taking one medicine for probably six weeks and it was not helping so my doctor switched me to the next brand on a list my psychiatrist made for me.
It was possibly two of the worst days of 2017. I had been uncontrollably crying for hours, I couldn’t stop the tears no matter how hard I tried. I felt nauseous, anxious and that I was actually losing my shit. I was absolutely terrified.
I called my boyfriend who had been at home with a cold to come over on a Sunday afternoon. He didn’t quite understand what was happening either but he held me while I cried and watched Star Wars.
Only after speaking to my therapist during the week I found out that I was experiencing withdrawal.
Don’t let my experience scare you or make you doubt that antidepressants can help people. Once I found my right medicine at the right dose, it all worked out. I have been on it for a year and a half and I’m doing pretty good!
I’m sorry this is so long!! I just had a lot to say about the topic of medicine for mental illness. I hope my story helped you to better understand how it can benefit people and give you the strength to go on medicine if that is the right choice for you.
Be Alright 